Wednesday, January 5, 2011

On Being a Size 4 and Buying Pretty Things

One of the motivational tools I use for my weight loss efforts is buying jeans that are a tad bit too small for me to fit into just yet. I hang them in my closet facing me as a daily reminder of where I'm trying to get. I've been wearing my last pair of "inspiration jeans" for most of the year and they are now starting to get big. That's pretty exciting for me and I decided it was time to get me some more inspiration.

Most jeans are a tough fit for me. My thighs are proportionately bigger than my waist - so finding a pair that will fit past my larger thighs but still fit my waist is usually a challenge. I buy most of my jeans from Lucky Brand because they usually have what I like and I'm too lazy to experiment with a ton of other brands. Since I was wearing a size 6 that was slightly large, I figured a size 4 in the same style would be just small enough to feed my inspiration. I tried the size 4 on and much to my surprise and amazement - they actually fit.

Size 4 - Lucky Brand

I was kind of taken back, this was not what I was expecting. I was even a little worried. Where do I go from here? If I fit a 4, am I supposed to buy a 2 for inspiration? No. That seems kind of weird. Picturing myself as a size 2 just seems ... scary for some reason. It's not that I'm unhappy with my current size. I actually think a 4 is pretty damn good and never really aspired to be smaller than that. But I am still working on my body fat percentage. My muffin top has shrunk, but is not gone completely.

Ultimately, I walked out of the store with nothing. I've decided not to buy any more jeans until I've reached my goal body. That might still be a size 4 - just shaped differently. And I guess it could also be a 2.

However - I did not leave the mall empty handed, it is sale season after all. For some reason - I just LOVE having shiny little shopping bags. I remember being younger and having neither the money nor the body to get the things that I wanted. Then once I got the money, it was just a dream that I would someday be able to fit in the clothes that looked so stunning in the store windows. It's taken over ten years to get here - but now I get to bring home shiny shopping bags with clothes that fit me that I can (somewhat) afford. And it feels really good to have accomplished some goals.

Shiny shopping bags!
Got this workout zip-up  from Bebe,
but in black
Got this from Arden B. - love their sales!


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